i hope your friday is filled with doughnuts.

I've been thinking a lot this week about a few comments I heard in lessons at church on Sunday, which to be honest, is pretty rare for me. I'm definitely guilty more often than not of going to church and never giving a second thought to what was said as I go about my week unless it was one of those Sundays where I'm assaulted with everything I've been looking for/needing to hear. 

Here's a very rough summary of my favorite comment made on Sunday: we're all looking for lovely things in our lives and what one person considers to be lovely doesn't necessarily touch another person the same way.

I've been trying to focus more this week on what I find lovely. What makes me happy. What draws me closer to God and lifts my heart. And I've been thinking about why we're sometimes hesitant to share that with others around us.  

So here's a picture of a doughnut. To me it's a reminder of the morning after Ben had to meet a rather big deadline and the first morning in a long time that he was able to take a breath and slow down. Even though it was a work day, we didn't set any alarms for 5:30am and instead woke up to the sun. Upon discovering that it was (supposedly) National Doughnut Day (still can't tell if it was or wasn't!), we walked a few blocks out of our way to pick up doughnuts before jumping on the train. It started to lightly sprinkle as we ate our doughnuts and walked, and it was just a really fabulous start to my Thursday morning. To be exact, it was one of those times I found lovely. 

So here's to sharing more of the lovely moments in life, and I hope you do the same!

10 things I would tell my 16-year old self.

 1. Your parents are actually pretty cool. Before you know it, you'll be calling up your parents every day just to chat because you're best friends.

2. You'll never see your high school friends again. Unless you make time for it. People get busy, move away, and life goes on. Besides a small handful of people that I text/meet up with when I'm in town/follow on Instagram or Facebook, I really couldn't care less about keeping in touch with people from high school.

3. Exclusive dating in high school is dumb. Why tie yourself down to one person when there are hundreds of other people you could get to know? Some people end up marrying their high school sweetheart, but most people could avoid a bunch of drama and heartbreak.

4. Study for the ACT test like your mom tells you to. Or else you'll end up scoring well enough to get into your college of choice, but you'll miss the mark for scholarships by a few points.

5. Take the time to figure out what you might like to study in college. In order to (help) avoid switching majors and losing time, do your research on different careers and narrow it down to a few realistic options.Also, meet with a counselor the first week of college and plan out your class schedule for the next few years if possible!

6. Stop spending money on snack wraps at McDonalds. A) McDonalds will make you fat, and B) what a waste of money that you'll wish you had in college when your textbooks come out to $500 a semester.

7. Wear sunscreen and don't go tanning. You only get one shot at keeping your skin healthy and cancer-free! And orange is an awful color on anyone.

8. Enjoy high school. Stop wishing away the days thinking that college will be so much better (which, let's be honest, it totally is). Enjoy the few responsibilities that you have and go have fun!

9. Do things you know you shouldn't more often. . .but nothing too bad! The worst thing I ever did in high school was climb on an elementary school roof to look at the stars with friends. Needless to say, I'm not a very exciting person because I don't like taking risks, haha. I wish I had more exciting stories to tell my future kids.

10. Sleep, read, cook, and serve more. Work on developing new skills and use all of that free time to do worthwhile things. Chatting with friends for hours each day is great, but it's not going to help you much 5, 10, or 20 years down the road. (Granted, moderation in all things - friends are great and totally necessary.)

 What would you tell your 16-year old self?

a secret, a challenge, and the results.

Just a quick reminder that tomorrow is the last day to sign up for the book swap I'm hosting! I'm pretty excited about it since we have quite a few women from all around the country signed up to participate. :)

Hello, I'm Lex and I have flaws.

Here's a little secret about me: I can be quite the grumpy gus sometimes which results in me not being the nicest person. Poor Ben has to deal with Grumpy Lex most mornings as I begin to wake up and get myself into the shower (reeeeeally not a morning person and probably never will be). And sometimes he gets the wrath of Grumpy Lex when I'm starving, super tired, stressed from having so much to do, or when I clean the house and it's a disaster 3 hours later. ;)

However, I recently printed out this quote and put it where I would see it each day because I felt like it was exactly what I've been needing to work on. President Monson's challenge became my own personal little challenge. Instead of thinking mean thoughts about drivers when they'd cut me off, I forced myself to get over it immediately and think of a few things I'm grateful for. Instead of becoming annoyed or agitated throughout the day when I'd get a headache or end up a little hungry at times, I challenged myself to think of others when those emotions would start to creep up on me. I'd send a text to someone, send a Facebook message, or make cookies to take to a friend if my schedule allowed - and guess what?

1) I've been a much nicer person to be around the past little while, and 2) I've perfected my Reese's Peanut Butter cookie recipe. Double bonus. You could say I'm a big fan of taking President Monson's counsel and putting it into action. :)

Happy Thursday, friends!

21 things i learned (and re-learned) during my 21st year of life.

Thanks to family and friends for making me feel like a million bucks yesterday! I had my hesitations about leaving 21 behind, but we're one day in and so far so good. ;)

21 things I learned (and re-learned) during my 21st year of life

It's okay to spend Friday night at home with no plans.

Getting laid off is no fun.

I can be in a hospital/around blood and not pass out.

Pray, pray, pray.

Cooking is actually fun.

Baking is even more fun.

Don't do business with people you know well.

Doing new things is good for you.

Traveling with your spouse is awesome.

Clothes and makeup don't bring happiness, but they kinda really do at the same time.

People like it when you remember small details they've mentioned.

The best things in life take a lot of work.

Choose good landlords.

Teaching a Primary class can be really frustrating and rewarding.

Sometimes you just need some froyo.

Date nights are the best nights.

Things will always work out.

Spontaneous plans make way better stories.

Peanut butter is delicious.

Stand by what you believe in and don't let others convince you otherwise.

Take a deep breath and start over.

growing takes some time.

I heard this phrase not too long ago, but it's one that I've been mulling over for the longest time.  (If that even makes sense?)

This past weekend I planted a few little plants.  I bought containers, plants, soil, and even a little watering can.  As I dug the holes for each plant and placed them in the soil, I thought about the quote above.  As I patted down the soil around the little plants and watered them, I thought about the quote above.  As I placed the containers in sun-lit areas, again, I thought about the quote.

As much as I reeeeeally want my plants to grow and start producing immediately (hello, homemade salsa!), I know that it isn't realistic.  I also know that there are things necessary to the success of my teeny, tiny garden--those things work together to create success over time.

I'd venture to say that it's pretty easy to look at baby plants and have patience; however, it's harder to look at things of more importance and have patience.  I'm guilty of it.  Actually, super guilty of it!  There are days I get frustrated with XYZ because it's not perfect now, or not happening in my life now.  When I take a step back, it's clear that I've been trying to rush situations.

At this point in my life, most situations I'm in are in the growing stage.  I'm working on remembering that it takes time for tomato plants to grow and produce results just the same as an education, career, marriage, etc., and that there are small things working together to create success.

All of the best things in life just get better with time, right? :)

unexpected places.

Last night I found myself sitting on a chair in the hallway of a broken down and grungy low-income apartment building.  A 4-year old lay on the floor next to me with a package of markers and a SpongeBob coloring book, all while kicking his feet together and softly humming to himself.  A young mother sat to my right holding her baby--a 4-month old who was alternating between complacency and distress, eventually giving way to her lethargy--soaking up all that was being taught and shared.  Across from the mother and I were two young men wearing suits, ties, and name tags.  They put their hearts into their message for this young mom and it was evident that they wanted to share all of their happiness with her.  It was there in that hallway in the rundown, low-income apartment building that I had one of the sweetest, most altruistic experiences to date.  I knew without a doubt that this young mother was being watched over and was loved so very, very much by her Heavely Father, and it was evident that she felt it too.

Want to know more about the message the two young men shared?  Read about it here.

infinitely more.

Yesterday in my Primary class we talked about a group of people in the Book of Mormon who had a mighty change of heart. Ultimately, this people chose good over evil, and were blessed by doing so. It got me thinking about how we're really more than the mistakes we make, and definitely more than our limitations--both of body and spirit.

I took a psychology class in high school and was taught about Carl Rogers and his humanistic approach to psychology.  It basically boils down to the belief that people are inherently good.  (Don't judge me if I have that wrong. ;)) I remember sitting in my seat listening to the teacher and thinking "Hey! That's basically how I think about humanity."  I guess little by little over the past few years, I've become more critical of humanity in general and developed the habit of assuming that (most) people are driven by selfish reasons.  And maybe it's because my eyes have been opened as I've grown up and had more life experiences?  I'm not quite sure.

The above quote is pulled from Elder Jeffrey R. Holland's talk from this past general conference which focused on mental and physical illnesses; however, I believe the quote is multifaceted.  I love the words for the fact that it can apply to our human nature and life circumstances, and I love the simple reminder it provides me.

Here's to trying harder to see past the imperfections of others, and trying harder to see people for their potential.  Fitting for the holiday season, isn't it?

xoxo

oh, i love it so.

volunteer opportunities are the best.

A school for immigrant children--many of which are displaced war refugees--had their back-to-school event this weekend here in St. Louis.  Our church group went to help with registration, handing out backpacks, providing lunches, and just to help curb the chaos.  It was so wonderful to talk to all of the kids and watch waves of euphoria wash over them when they were handed a brand new backpack or even a snowcone! The girl above giving the camera a peace sign told me that I was "sooooo lucky" to have been born in America.  And you know what?  

She's completely right and I needed the reminder. :)

President Hinckley was one smart cookie.

via

Keep trying.

Some days are definitely harder than others.  Some days I just can't figure out what I'm supposed to be doing with my life.  Some days I wake up on the wrong side of the bed.  Some days everything goes wrong.  Some days I make a fool of myself or forget important things.  Some days I don't quite reach the expectations I've set for myself.  Some days I honestly don't get a lot done once I come home from work, and I choose to be lazy.  Some days I work myself into the ground.  Some days are just a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day (please say you've read this book!).  But it's okay, because tomorrow is always a new day with new possibilities.

Be believing.

To believe something is to have confidence and faith in a truth.  Believe in tomorrows and second chances.  Believe that you have the power to turn something negative into a positive.  Most importantly, believe in God's plan for you, His timing, and His love for you.

Be happy.

Oh, how I love this simple statement!  Choose to be happy.  Be a catalyst of happiness; help others to be happy.  In Gretchen Rubin's book The Book of Happiness, she writes about 8 splendid truths of happiness that she discovers about herself and people in general.  The second splendid truth is, "One of the best ways to make yourself happy is to make other people happy; One of the best ways to make other people happy is to be happy yourself."  Think about it.

Don't get discouraged.

Realize that it's okay to have hard days!  Realize that everyone else gets discouraged too.  But definitely don't forget to keep trying, be believing, and be happy.

Everything will work out.

A promise--everything will work out.  We all choose to be happy for different reasons, but I think I choose to be happy because I know that it will all work out.  God is good.  He is so, so good to me, as I'm sure He is to you.  And what a blessing it is to know that His love is a constant.

everyone you meet.

I work with some pretty amazing people.  They come from all over the world and have had experiences I will probably never have.  They each bring a new perspective and way of thinking to the table (literally--gotta love lab meetings.), and it amazes me that a group of people can all think so differently.

Today at work, our department had a poster event for post- and pre-docs here at the university, so I had the opportunity to talk to one of my co-workers for a couple of hours as we kept an eye on the food and made sure the coolers were stocked with enough pop.  It was really interesting to hear about her life, schooling, years raising kids, and going back to school.  But through all of that, she said one thing that really stood out to me.

"I try to learn something from everyone I meet.  Even people I talk to for a minute and will never see again can teach me something."

Like, woah.

But in all seriousness, what an awesome perspective to have on meeting new people.  And what a great example.

tips for creating happiness & peace.

I saw this on a blog yesterday, and thought it had some great points!  Definitely going to work on some of these.

-----

40 Tips for an Exceptional, Superb & Powerful Life

{unknown source}

1. Take a 10-30 minute walk every day and while you walk, smile. It is the ultimate anti-depressant.
2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day. 
3. Buy a TiVo (DVR), tape your late night shows and get more sleep.
4. When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, "My purpose is to _____ today."
5. Live with the 3 Es - Energy, Enthusiasm, Empathy, and the 3 Fs - Faith, Family, Friends.
6. Play more games with friends and read more books than you did last year.
7. Make time to practice meditation and prayer. They provide us with daily fuel for our busy lives. 
8. Spend more time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of six. 
9. Dream more while you are awake. 
10. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less foods that are manufactured in plants. 
11. Drink some green tea and plenty of water. Eat blueberries, seafood, broccoli, almonds & walnuts.
12. Try to make at least three people smile each day. 
13. Clear your clutter from your house, your car, and your desk and let new energy into your life. 
14. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead, invest your energy in the positive present moment. 
15. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn and pass all your tests. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
16. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a college kid with a maxed out charge card.
17. Smile and laugh more. It will keep the energy vampires away. 
18. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. 
20. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
21. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree. 
22. Make peace with your past, so it won't mess up the present. 
23. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about. 
24. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you. 
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"
27. Forgive everyone for everything. 
28. What other people think of you is none of your business. 
29. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.
30. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
32. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
33. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
34. The best is yet to come.
35. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up. 
36. Do the right thing.
37. Call your family often.
38. Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements: "I am thankful for _____." "Today I accomplished _____." 
39. Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.
40. Enjoy the ride. Remember that this is not Disney World and you certainly don't want a fast pass. Make the most of it and enjoy the ride.

hobo clothes & pencil skirts.

Guys... this news is like the best things I've heard in months.

I found the perfect job!!!  And got it!

Definitely learned a lot of lessons through it all, but the biggest one was to trust in Heavenly Father's timing.  The craziest thing about it all was that before we moved out here I started applying to jobs and was hearing back from multiple companies, except they wanted someone to start up immediately.  I couldn't do that since we were still in Utah and in school.  Once we got out here, nothing.  I wasn't having very much luck.

Long story short... lots of job searching.  Job interviews.  Discouraged girl.  Jobs came along, but not what was wanted.  Girl figures will have to plan on being a hobo.  More job searching.  More job interviews not going anywhere.  Girl buys hobo clothes and finds perfect hobo corner.  Amazing job comes along.  Lots of praying.  Gets to the final interview stage.  Asked if job is wanted.  Fist pump in front of professor offering job.  (Just kidding.)  Fist pump later in privacy of apartment.  Girl gets rid of hobo clothes and buys a nice pencil skirt instead.

The End.


Happy Friday to you all, and have a fabulous weekend!

little things.

Our living room gives us a view of the Mississippi,

and it's kind of fun to watch the boats and barges float on by.

Obviously I don't get out much.  ;)

(This picture made me think of my dad because it has a parking lot, bridges, roads, train tracks, metro tracks, and a river in it.  An engineer's dream...I think?)

Also, this past weekend we crossed over into Illinois when we missed our freeway exit and ended up in probably the poorest neighborhood I've ever seen as we drove 50 feet to turn around.  Someone with influence needs to pull a Jacob Riis move and raise some awareness.

So, so grateful for what Ben and I do have.

And especially grateful for our little view of the Mississippi.